And this is how it all ended.
Since it’s Valentine’s Day I wanted to remind you all how nobody will ever love you unless you are fit. Hopefully this guide is some help.
I know it’s not Father’s Day, but it’s always important to pay respect to yours. How will you honor your father today? I will honor mine by sending him a sweet message on Myspace.
Kirby immediately went home and died of autoerotic asphyxiation. He died with a lot more dignity than his father ever will.
Poop makes everything funnier; especially baptisms.
It’s like Goldilocks and the Three Bears only more hurtful than getting mauled to death by a bear.
The first time I had my Scoliosis checked I was wearing a Godzilla shirt. The last time I had it checked was also the first time. What makes a gym teacher qualified to judge my future back problems?
Life is tough for the Whitens. They only have one couch and their TV isn’t even flat.
The Shining is probably my favorite movie I have never watched all the way through in one sitting. You, on the other hand, are my least favorite person I cannot possibly sit through an entire conversation with.
I never liked playing Truth or Dare because I was never dared to kiss anyone cute and always forced to speak very self-deprecating truths.